As The Leader Grows with Ken Joslin

Coaching with Ken | The Feedback Loop

• Ken Joslin

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Ever wondered how a catastrophic financial loss could turn into an invaluable lesson in resilience? In this episode, we unpack a deeply personal story of facing a staggering $150,000 to $160,000 loss following a bold decision at the Create Conference in Dallas. The experience was a crucible moment, leading to a severe panic attack, yet it was through the support of close friends and effective calming techniques that I navigated this turbulent period. We explore how such setbacks, although painful, can serve as powerful catalysts for both personal and professional growth, emphasizing the importance of taking risks, learning from failures, and leveraging feedback for development.

Join us as we highlight a pivotal conversation with my mentor Vic, whose brutally honest feedback during a crisis moment was as transformative as it was challenging. We'll also reflect on a past success in ministry work, where insights from mentor Ron Luce played a crucial role in shaping my leadership journey. These stories illustrate the necessity of embracing criticism without defensiveness and using it to sharpen our skills and resilience. This episode is a must-listen for anyone looking to gain inspiration and practical advice on handling entrepreneurial setbacks and fostering a growth-oriented mindset.

Welcome to the ATLG podcast I am your host Ken Joslin, former pastor turned coach & host of CREATE, the #1 Faith-based Entrepreneur conference in America. My mission is to help faith-based entrepreneurs become the best version of themselves by growing in our Core 5: Faith, Health, Relationships, Business & Finances. You can get more information as well as join our FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/676347099851525

If you enjoyed the podcast, come join our FREE GSD Community of hundreds of entrepreneurs & a ton of FREE Content including CREATE Conference recordings with Ken, John Maxwell, Gary Brecka, Ed Mylett & more. growstackdrive.com/free

Speaker 1:

guys and I don't know if I'm going to title this the feedback loop growth mindset, but I wanted to share with you today and I wanted to pose this thought to you If your first thought when someone brings you feedback or constructive criticism is to look for faults in the person that is bringing you this information, then you will never achieve your full potential. And, guys, I see this happen far too often. I see this happen way more than it should. When you try to bring someone feedback, especially someone you're close to, and you try to bring someone feedback, Now, obviously this is going to be in a relationship or at a moment to where it's usually unsolicited. Now I want to take you back to a story in my life.

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We'll go back to last July at our Create Conference. The Create Conference at the beginning of that year in 2023, the Create Conference at the beginning of that year, in 2023, we knocked it out of the park. It was the best month. We did almost $400,000 in revenue in one month. I think we did $384,000 in revenue that month and at Create, we did over $200,000 in revenue, and the event was I can't even begin to tell you what an unbelievable success. It was Friends like John Maxwell, Ed Milet, Gary Brecka, Vic Keller, Brent Gove, Marie Cosgrove Just some amazing, amazing friends. Three-day event Absolutely crushed it. We got done with the event. A couple of my buddies were like, dude, you need to do this again this year. Like you need to do two of these, One here and find another spot around the country. Well, again, I'm a risk taker and business and what we do in the entrepreneurial world really is all about taking risks. Right, it's a hundred percent about taking risks. And so I said we're going to do another one of these in July, six months later, in Dallas, Texas. Well, I lost about $150,000 to $160,000 on that event. I got absolutely crushed. So let me give you and I'm going to give you some numbers so you know how dramatic it was. The first year at Create, I think our sales were like 180,000. Second year at Create, our sales were 250-ish. The next time we tried to do a Create conference in Dallas and I had 160 some odd people in the room, so there's a lot of people in the room Our sales that weekend for Create were $400. Now wrap your head around that. We went from mid one hundreds I think it was 180 the first year two, 50 to two, 60, just at the conference, the second year, and almost 400 K in revenue for the month to $400. We sold two half price general remission tickets to the next create conference.

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Devastated, I can't begin it. As a matter of fact, let me tell you how devastated I was. I woke up that morning around five o'clock, four, 30, five o'clock AM, central time. I was in my hotel in Dallas. My heart was beating out of my chest. I was sweating like profuse, Like I literally had just walked out of the gym or got off my Peloton, and I'm like oh my God, what's wrong with me? And I picked my phone up and I text my group chat Gary Brecka, Brent Gove, um Vic Keller, Brian Covey, Randy Garn. I texted my five guys. I said guys, this is what's going on. I have no idea what's happening with me. I didn't know if I was having a heart attack. I had no idea. I knew the stress level was huge because I knew that I had just gotten crushed financially over the weekend Forward.

Speaker 1:

Facing conference was amazing Brenda Burchard, Erwin McManus, Gary, me all. We crushed it, knocked it out of the park. The problem was I got out over my skis and I tried to do another event and the people that were again event's great, but everybody that was at the event were people that were already involved in what we were doing, so there was not really an opportunity to be able to generate revenue. Shoot that text out to my guys. Gary Breck is the first he's up because Gary's kind of like I hate me, he's kind of crazy like that.

Speaker 1:

As far as getting up early in the morning, Gary texts me back. He goes Ken, it's going to be okay, You're having a panic attack. It never happened to me before. I had no idea what was going on. He goes here's what you need to do. And he gave me some breathing exercises and he said go, take a cool shower. Here's your breathing exercises and doing the shower, You're going to be okay. So I do that. And it took me about 30 minutes to calm down. And when I did, when I got my nervous system regulated because, listen, I've done a lot of somatic therapy, so I understand what it's like to do somatic therapy I could not get my nervous system regulated. I was, literally. I was terrified. And so I did the breathing work, um, hopped in the shower, took a cool shower, was texting the guys hey guys, I'm, I'm, I'm okay. I laid back down in the bed and went to sleep. I think I slept for about two and a half hours before I got my first text.

Speaker 1:

I think Vic was the first one that texted me to check on me, and I'll never forget getting up and then having to face the day Like holy cow how did we, how did I make the decision to do this and get, I mean, literally crushed. So I want to fast forward a few hours in that day. I leave to drive back to Birmingham, I leave my car. I got about nine hours and I had texted Vic earlier that day and I said, dude, I need some time, I need some feedback, I want to have a conversation. I got in the car, I was just pulling outside, I was just getting out of Dallas, headed towards Birmingham. Because I was still in Birmingham at the time.

Speaker 1:

I got on the phone with Vic and we spent an hour and 15 minutes on that call, about an hour and a half break because he had something to do, and then another hour and 15 minutes after that, About two and a half hours of the nine-hour trip. I was on the phone with Vic. Here's what I want you to catch, because this is huge Again. If your first thought when somebody brings you truth or constructive feedback, if your first thought is, let me find fault in the person who's bringing me this information, you will never reach your full potential. I'm telling you, it's impossible for you to reach your full potential if that's your attitude and if that's your mindset, and it also is a barometer and shows you that you really truly do not have a growth mindset. And I'm telling you, guys, I'm on the phone with Vic and I said dude, I need your feedback. The first question he asked me was this. And I said dude, I need your feedback. The first question he asked me was this he said, Ken, do you want my feedback or do you want my honest feedback? I had a decision to make and, guys, I'm going to be really honest with you.

Speaker 1:

I could not have been more raw in where I was at at that moment. You want to talk about raw? Yeah, I had, just four or five hours earlier, had a panic attack. I had literally watched what I had built in my company over two and a half years from zero. I started with $5,000. I had grown that to almost $300,000 in my bank I had watched. I lost almost every bit of that. I was down to less than $50,000. I was decimated.

Speaker 1:

I can't tell you what a difficult day that was. I get on the phone with him and he asked me that question. I had a decision right there in the car. As raw as it was I mean literally, it was so painful to be on that phone call with Vic that day. And when he said, do you want feedback or do you want my honest feedback? Here was my answer. I said, Vic, I can't get better unless you give me your honest feedback and I'll never forget the next 40 minutes of that hour and 15 minute first call we had.

Speaker 1:

The very first thing Vic said to me was dude, I love you, he goes, you are doing things. Vic said dude, I love you, You're doing things that very few people on the planet are doing. I love your heart, I love who you are as a man, but you do not have enough people in your life who will tell you when things aren't like they should be, he goes. You have too many people around you that tell you how amazing you are. You have too many people around you that tell you how awesome you are. And I'm sitting here Now. I literally I had just lost all this money, had gotten again.

Speaker 1:

Forward-facing conference was great. Everybody loved it, Everybody thought it was amazing. Tons of relationships, fantastic. Backside, behind the curtain, the view nobody else gets. I'm having a panic attack at 4.35 am in the morning. Now I'm having to drive for nine hours and process through what happened. Everybody goes.

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I want to be an entrepreneur. Do you know how many times I hear people say I want to do live events? I'm like no, you don't, you have no idea. You have no idea what it's like to try to pull off what we pull off two or three times a year. It's. There are times, guys, there are times where I'm like what in the world am I doing? There are times where I'm like what in the world am I doing? I don't have to do this, but I feel called to do this. No-transcript. And then, as raw as your heart and your mind may be, Vic, I can't get better unless you give me honest feedback and I'll never forget that. First 40 minutes of that hour and 15 minute phone call About every three to four minutes, Vic would check in with me. He'd go buddy, are you doing? All right. I'm driving down the road and I'm like, is this exactly? I think so, I think I'm okay and he would just give me honest feedback, like hard feedback, and I'm listening to this and you're like, and some of the people watching this video, guys, let me, let me go back to, let me go back to one of the most pivotal moments in my ministry.

Speaker 1:

When I did student ministry, I grew one of the largest, most well-known student ministries in America here in the Atlanta area. We did myself, my good friend, Tony Elrod, who was a youth pastor for my good friend, Jensen Franklin at free chapel, and a bunch of other student pastors in the area, like all different denominations. We got together. So we want to do an event in Gainesville. So we did one called. It was called one day, I think it was what it's called and we did this at the, at a facility in Gainesville called the mountain center. We had about 1,100 students show up to this back-to-school rally for all the youth groups in the city.

Speaker 1:

So we're doing this event and we finally agreed on a speaker to come in, Ron Luce, who was a mentor and a friend of mine, and I said listen, let's get Ron. Everybody's like yes, we can agree, because we couldn't theologically agree on who we wanted to speak. No, he's too Baptist. No, he's Pentecostal. Anyway, you know how the church world goes. So Ron comes in. I'm emceeing the event. I've got my good friends from Nashville Revelation Underground. They're in doing worship and leading and there's 1,000, 1,100 kids in this huge auditorium. We're having a blast. I'm emceeing and I watch Ron walk in the door with Tony and I'm on stage and I watch him walk in the door and I watch him walk up the steps and I watch him sit in the camera. Well, and I know Ron and I watch him. He's just observing everything that's going on.

Speaker 1:

And we went to Chili's that night. Tony and I took Ron to Chili's after the event was over, which is, if you've ever been a student pastor, Chili's is the place to go, or Applebee's because it was cheap back in the day. So we're sitting there and I'll never forget. The server comes over and he takes our order and I said dude, do you have a pen and a paper? He goes I got a napkin and I've got a pen. So I had my pen and my napkin out there and I asked Ron this question.

Speaker 1:

I said he was talking about hey, you guys did. He said, Ken, you guys did an amazing job. I said, Ron, I know we did good. It was a week. It was the first event we've ever done at this size 1,000 kids. I know we knocked it out of the park. What could we have done better? And Ron looked at me. He goes Ken, dude, you guys, you crushed it Like it was really, really it was done. Well. This is what I told him. It's guys, listen, I'm telling you feedback. It's one of my core values. I'm not only open to feedback, but I actively pursue feedback. If you don't have a feedback loop in your life and people who will speak truth into your life, you will never live to your full potential.

Speaker 1:

I looked at Ron sitting across the table. I said, Ron, I've been listening to your this was cassettes back in the day, because we're talking about 1998, 99-ish. I said, Ron, I've been listening to your leadership cassettes for about two years now. I watched you walk in the building. I watched you walk up the stairs and sit in that camera well, with Tony, and I watched you observe everything that was going on.

Speaker 1:

Ron, I know we did a great job, I know we knocked it out of the park. But how can we get better? And, guys, for 10 minutes he gave me one thing right after another, One thing right after another. The very first thing he said because I noticed the thing too, he goes the projector screen. The projector on the screen was crooked, it wasn't square, and that was one of the very first things I saw, because I'm a low OCD. But he just kept going and just giving me all this feedback, all these, and they were small things, but they were things of excellence.

Speaker 1:

And that conversation with Ron, had I not had that conversation with him, it opened the door for him to become my mentor. It opened the door for him to put me in rooms that I had never gotten in before. It opened the door for him to put me in rooms that I had never gotten in before. It opened the door for him to put me on stage behind John Maxwell, in front of Jeannie, who was one of my mentors. It opened so many doors. Why? Because I wanted to get better. I know we did great.

Speaker 1:

Same thing with Vic. I know the event was a success. Listen, Brendan Burchard stood on stage, put his arm around me and said guys, I've been doing this 15 years, I have never given anyone two days of my time outside of Kent. I know we did good forward, facing Great, but what could we have done better? Dude, I am. I'm in that moment. Yes, it was one of the toughest days I've had in the past 25 years professionally. Not only did that happen, but I got a call that morning and found out that one of the guys who I thought was my best friend was a Ponzi schemer. He was fake. Everything he had wasn't even real, and so I'm processing through all these things.

Speaker 1:

Do you want feedback or do you want honest feedback? Vic, I can't get better unless you give me honest feedback. Guys, if you want to reach your full potential, you are going to have to be open to me. You can't be open to everybody, but you better be open to the right people. You better be actively pursuing feedback from the people who care about you, from the people who see the purpose and potential in you. Because, listen, if somebody doesn't see the purpose and potential in you, it doesn't do you any good to go get feedback from that person. You need to get feedback from people who see your full potential, Like when they see on the inside of you what's going on and they see, man, this guy's got a call, this guy's got a purpose, this guy has got a dream and a vision that can literally leave impact and legacy around the world. And when you get around those kind of people, what happens is they begin to be specific with their feedback and it can be a little more painful because they see the potential that's in your life.

Speaker 1:

And so I spent an hour and 15 minutes on that first call with Vic and for the first 35 to 40 minutes it was rough feedback. It was just it was. It was rough feedback. And let me say the feedback wouldn't have been so rough had it not been so raw and real and in the moment. But it was raw and, like I said, Vic was so gracious with me. He said about every three, four minutes he would check in and go buddy, you okay, Brother, you all right, I'm just listening. I'm like, yeah, I'm good, I think I'm good, Driving down the road about 90 miles an hour in my car, heading towards Birmingham, thinking, holy cow, what have I done? My mind's going a million miles an hour going. How did I build what I've built in two and a half years, just to watch it get decimated in two and a half days.

Speaker 1:

If someone brings you feedback, if someone offers you or brings you constructive feedback, even if it's constructive criticism, if somebody brings you some information and the first thought you have is to look for faults in that person, then I promise you you'll never reach your full potential. So here's a question I want to ask you this morning, and this one's going to be quick we're 18 minutes. I want to ask you this question Are you not only open to feedback, but are you actively pursuing feedback, Feedback from the right people, the people who love you, the people who see the potential and the purpose on the inside of you and the people who genuinely want to do life with you and walk through life with you and help you become the best version of yourselves? If you have those type of people in your life and you're open to the feedback, even when it sucks because I'm going to tell you, guys and you've heard the saying, embrace the suck. I think that's what my friend Ben Newman says Embrace the suck. Listen, it freaking sucked. It was one of the worst days professionally I've ever had. But, guys, what God did in that 48 to 72 hour timeframe shifted the way that I've done everything else since that day and has put us in position to have greater impact, to have greater influence and to be able to leave greater legacy.

Speaker 1:

Guys, thanks for joining me on this episode of as the Leader Grows. I am your host, Kent Jocelyn. I cannot wait to see you next week. And number two thank you for helping us become in the top one and a half podcasts in the entire country. Blows my mind the number of people that download these episodes. If this is added value, I'm going to ask you to do two things. Number one subscribe and share. I love you, guys. We'll see you next week on as Leader Grows.